“Shiru-shiru halina ne Bilal, shisa naka ya ke mun yawa a kwanakin nan.”
Rayyan ya fada mishi, yasan bai yi maganar dan yana jiran amsa ba, ya fada ne kawai saboda abinda yake ran shine. In da ya tsammaci amsa ne Bilal din bashi da abin cewa, shiru-shirun da yake yi ba zabi bane ba, dole ce ta saka mishi. Ya kanji mutane sunyi maganar tsoro, sunyi maganar kwana cikin firgici. Yanzun ya gane ma’anonin kalaman su, baccin kirki baya samu sosai. A tsorace yake al’amuran shi, ko kallon shi yaga Rayyan ya cikayi sai yaga kamar yana zargin akwai abu mai girma da yake boye mishi, kamar yana so ya gane cewa ya ci amanar shi ne.
Sanda duk zaiyi waya da Abbu sai zuciyar shi ta doka, muryar Abbu yanzun batayi mishi komai sai kara gigita mishi lissafi. Hirar su da Abbu batayin tsayi, saboda a kagauce yake daya sauke wayar kafin ya fadi abinda baiyi niyya ba. Yana fadama kan shi maganar da Malamai da yawa sukayi a kaine na boye zunubi irin wannan, saboda bayayin komai sai yada rikici da haifar da shakku a zukatan mutane, in dai har ranka zaka tuba saboda Allah, zaka kiyaye sharuddan tuban, to kayi shiru shine mafi alkhairi, Allah ya sirranta zunubinka ne saboda dalilai da dama. Har wa’azin ya lalubo ya saka a wayar shi ko zai saukaka mishi jin nauyin amanar daya ha’inta da yakeyi.
Kwanan shi biyu a asibiti aka sallame shi, duk yanda Rayyan ya yi mishi maganar ya huta kafin ya koma makaranta sai ya kasa. In ya zauna baya komai sai tunani, zuwa makarantar na rage mishi tunani, yakan yi kokari sosai wajen mayar da hankalin shi kan lissafin da akeyi. Sai da aka hada sati daya a hakan, kafin ya dauki wayar shi yaga shigowar saqo, ya dauka Aisha ce, dan itace comfort din shi a wannan lokacin, har tausayin damuwar da yakan gani a cikin idanuwanta yake yi, damuwar da yake da yakinin shine silarta.
“Nawan wani abu na damun ka, nasan zaka fada mun inda zaka iya. Amman bana so wallahi, ko mene ne yake damun ka yana mun ciwo a zuciyata saboda bansan me ya kamata inyi in taimaka maka ba.”
Murmushi ya iya yi mata, duk wani abu da zatayi domin shi tana comforting din shine, a lokaci daya kuma tana saka shi jin yanda da duk dakika bai kyauta mata ba itama. Kamar yaci amanar duk tarin kaunar da takeyi mishi. Shisa yake ta wasa da wayar a hannun shi, bai bude ba, jiya ya kasa zuwa ya ganta, ta kira shi da daddare bai daga ba, kuma baibi kiran ba da safiyar ranar, sai ya dauka itace tayi mishi sakon a lokacin, ya fi mintina goma yana tararrabin budewa, sai daya duba yaga sunan Layla sannan wani abu ya tsirga mishi. Tun da akayi abin bai yarda ya sakata a idanuwan shi ba, baisan ta inda zai fara ba.
Jikin shi na rawa ya bude.
“Bansan me zance ba Hamma, bansan me zan fada maka ba, har raina ina so in dora laifin komai a kanka ko zan samu sauki, amman na kasa, saboda kana daya daga cikin mazan da suke a rayuwata da nake da tabbacin ba zasu taba cutar dani ba. Har yanzun ina cikin rudani, ban san ko abinda zan fada ya kamata ba, ina so in roke ka, dan Allah karka fada idan kayi niyya, sirrin mu ne mu biyu, kowa zai iya zabar abinda zaiyi da na shi nasani, amman shirun ka shine kariyar karshe da zaka bani. Martabata ce akan layi idan kayi magana, mu manta idan zamu iya, dan Allah ina rokon ka. Ka goge idan ka karanta.”
Ya karanta yafi sau goma, yana shirin gogewa ne wani sakon nata ya shigo.
“Zamu raba laifin abinda ya faru Hamma, karka dauka duka kai kadai.”
Wata irin ajiyar zuciya ya sauke da baisan daga inda ta fito ba, duk da bata sauke nauyin da yake ji a kirjin shi ba, ta bude wasu hanyoyi da suka toshe mishi. Ya kasa bata amsa daga lokacin har zuwa yanzun, ya dai goge sakonnin kamar yanda ta bukata. Bashida kwarin gwiwar hada idanuwa da ita, har yanzun idan ya kwanta bai daina addu’ar farkawa ya ga komai ya kasance mafarki ba. Sai dai da duk ranar da zata wuce da yanda gaskiyar komai da ya faru yake kara zauna mishi.
Babu abinda yake kara mishi nauyi sai kallon Rayyan a duk rana, musamman yanda yake ganin damuwa a idanuwan Rayyan din, sosai yake son ya koma dai-dai, ya manta abinda ya faru, amman ta ina zai fara idan yanajin amanar mutanen daya kamata ya roka gafara tana danne shi? Idan yana jin kamar yana yawo da hakkin da zai iya mutuwa da shi rataye a kai a kowanne lokaci? Gabaki daya dan karfin da ya rage mishi ne ya tattara akan karatun shi ko zai sami sauki. Musamman yanzun da aka fara jarabawa, sosai karatun yake zamar mishi wata hanyar da zaiyi amfani da ita wajen kaucewa wasu tunane-tunane.
Yau dai tazo mishi daban, bashi da jarabawa, shisa yace zai kai Rayyan din Kaduna inda aka kaishi don fara bautar kasa. Tunda yake shiri sai ranar take ta dawo mishi da abubuwa da dama, kamar ranar da Rayyan zai tafi Bauchi haka yake jin shi. In da duk yayi nan Rayyan da yake zaune yake bin shi da kallo. Tun suna asibiti yake kula da Bilal din, kamar akwai abinda yake damun shi fiye da jinyar da ya keyi.
“Tunanin me kake yi? Mene ne? Bilal jinin ka ya hau… Me ka sa a ranka da ban sani ba.”
Ya tambaye shi, amman shiru Bilal yayi yana kasa hada idanuwa da shi.
“Aisha ce?”
Ya sake tambaya, kai Bilal ya girgiza mishi, ganin kamar a takure yake sai ya kyale shi. Saboda yana ganin bashi da lafiya, bai kamata ya takura shi da yawa ba. Ya yarda da Bilal, ya kuma san halayen shi, idan har ya kamata ya sani zai fada mishi. Sai dai kwanaki sunata tafiya, damuwar Bilal din kuma gani yake tana kara yawa, har makaranta ya shiga yaje department din su Bilal yayi tsaye a bakin ajin su, da yaga ya fito sai da dariya mai sauti ta kwace mishi.
“Me nake tunani?”
Ya furta yana girgiza kai, nan ba sakandire bace ko ma yace firamari da zaiyi tunanin ko wani ne yake takurama Bilal din harya shiga damuwa. Amman ya rasa me ya kamata yayi tunani, abin na damun shi. Haka suka jera tare suka koma gida, kowa da tunanin da yakey i a ran shi. Yana kallon Bilal, kusan shi kan shi a darare yake da Bilal din, ko abinci ya karbo musu wajen Aisha, ko shi Layla ta kira shi yaje ya karba in ya kawo sai ya taba Bilal sau goma kafin su gama ci saboda yanda yake tafiya duniyar tunani, kamar yakan manta cewa yana cin abinci ne sai ya tuna mishi.
Layla ma yana ganin kamar akwai abinda yake damun ta, baya jure kallon idanuwanta ne, a yan lokuttan daya kalla din, a kasa tsoron da suke bashi akwai damuwa shimfide a cikin su, sai yake ganin kamar harda tsoro da wani abu da ya kasa fahimta. Randa yaje ganin ta, sosai zuciyar shi take cike da soyayyar ta, haka yasa shi kai hannu don ya taba fuskarta, ba dan yana son tabata din ba, so yake yaji ko da sauran zazzabi su koma asibiti, amman yanda ta janye jikinta tana kallon shi da wani irin firgici shi kan shi ya tsorata.
“Ina so inji ko da zazzabi ne a jikin ki har yanzun.”
Ya fadi da sauri, amman zai rantse jikinta bari yake yi, yaso ya rike ko da hannunta ne ko zata natsu, amman kai take dinga girgiza mishi.
“Naji sauki, babu zazzabin Hamma, babu.”
Ta furta, kai ya jinjina yana kallon ta, har sai da yaga ta dan nutsu tukunna
“Mene ne?”
Ya tambaya can kasan makoshi.
“Ba komai.”
Ta amsa cikin sanyin murya
“Layla…”
Dago kanta tayi, amman ta kasa hada idanuwa da shi.
“Ban san me yake damun Bilal ba, ba zan iya hadawa da taki damuwar ba, ki fadamun idan akwai wani abu…”
Kai ta sake girgiza mishi. Bai matsa mata ba, haka suka cigaba da zama shiru, saboda yana bukatar zama a kusa da ita. Amman ita ba kamar Bilal ba, tana dariya, tana mishi hira kamar ko da yaushe, amman yana kula da yanda take barin space a tsakanin su duk idan zasu zauna, yanda take tabbatar akwai wani abu a hannunta idan suna tafiya, dan kar ya kama hannunta, yana kula da duk kananun canjin da yake tunanin kalmar son daya furta mata ce ta saka shi a tsakanin su. Bai damu ba, yana son ta ya sani, ya riga da ya fada yana son ta.
Tun kafin ya fada mata yasan ita din tashi ce, idan bata rike hannun shi yanzun ba, zata rike nan gaba. Abu daya ya sani, hannun shine na farko kuma na karshe da zata taba rikewa a rayuwarta. Yana da wani irin kishi da akanta ne ya fahimci hakan, musamman yanzun, ko ganinta yaje yi duk idan zai tafi sai yace mata.
“Bana son kowa a kusa da ke kin sani ko?”
Dariya takan yi ta daga mishi kai, haka kawai saboda ita yakan shiga cikin makaranta, murmushi yakan bata a matsayin tukwici saboda yanayin shigar da takeyi yanzun, abaya take dorawa akan kayanta, wasu ranakun ma hijabi take sakawa, tana mishi kyau naban mamaki, hakan dai bai hana shi jin wani zafi a kirjin shi ba, duk idan yaga tana magana da wani dan ajin su, baya son ganin kowa a kusa da ita. Har ran shi baya so, ya fara kirga kwanakin da suke cikin shekara biyu da kusan rabi daya rage mata a ABU.
Jiyama tun da aka yi Magriba yana wajenta sun sami waje sun zauna, ba wani hira suke ba tunda ta bashi labarin jarabawarta, da wani yaro da aka kama yana satar amsa. Da akayi isha’i dai ita ta koma cikin hostel shikuma yaje masallacin yayi sallah. Suka kara dawowa, shine ma yace mata.
“Gobe da safe zan tafi In shaa Allah…Bilal zai kaini.”
Shiru ta danyi na wasu dakika.
“Sai yaushe zan gan ka?”
Numfasawa ya yi, goben zai kama lahadi.
“Zan shigo nan da sati daya in shaa Allah…”
Kallon shi Layla tayi, ya girgiza mata kai.
“Kar kimun kuka Layla, idan zan iya zuwa a wasu ranakun da ba karshen mako ba zan zo.”
Muryarta a shagwabe tace,
“Ba zan gan ka ba, mun gama jarabawa, na tafi gida sannan.”
Ta karasa maganar da wani irin yanayi.
“Zan zo gida… Bance nan da satin ba, amman zan zo in gan ki.”
Numfashi ta sauke.
“Ka siyi waya Hamma.”
Zuciyar shi yaji ta doka, kamar ya dora hannun shi a kirji karta fito waje, saboda sai da ta saka idanuwanta cikin na shi tukunna tayi maganar.
“Ina da waya.”
Ya amsa yana dauke idanuwan shi daga cikin nata.
“Wannan ba waya bace ba, calculator ce kake da Hamma.”
Ta karasa tana dariya, rankwashinta yaje yi ta kauce tana sakeyin dariya.
“Waya nake nufi, waya irin ta kowa da kowa.”
Kafadu yadan daga.
“Ni ki barni.”
Gyara zamanta tayi tana fuskantar shi.
“Dan Allah Hamma, zamu dinga chatting, ko bamuyi ba zan kiraka video call in gan ka idan baka zo ba.”
Shiru yayi yana jinta.
“Kaji… Dan Allah.”
Shirun dai ya sakeyi yana kauda kan shi gefe, bata gaji ba ta tashi ta same shi ta dayan gefen tana fadin.
“Ka siyi babbar waya Hamma.”
Numfashi Rayyan ya sauke.
“Ni ki barni, bani da kudi.”
Da sauri ta amsa.
“Ni ina da kudi sai in baka.”
Murmushi yayi yana mikewa saboda dare ya fara yi, kuma yanzun Bilal na ran shi ko da yaushe, basu ci abinci ba ya fito, baya so ya koma ya samu Bilal ya yi bacci, ba zai iya tashin shi ba, ba kuma yaso ya kwanta bai ci abinci ba.
“Allah ina da kudi, Abbu ya sake turamun, kuma kaga bamuci abinci a waje ba sosai, dafawa mukeyi ni da Anisa. Ka bani account number dinka sai in maka transfer.”
Wannan karin ya rankwasheta, ta dafe wajen tana murzawa.
“Na fasa baka Hamma.”
Tace tana murza wajen sosai, murmushin ya sakeyi.
“Dan Allah ka siya.”
Numfashi ya sauke yana furta.
“Mayya…”
Dariya kawai tayi, harya rakata tana mishi magiyar ya siyi waya. Kuma da tunanin ya tashi yau da safe, har yana gama shirin shi. Baima san wacce zai siya ba idan ya tashi, ko kuma nawa kudaden su suke, da gaske bashi da kudi, Abbu yana tura mishi duk wata, ko da ya gama makaranta, Abbu kuma ya sani bai daina tura mishi kudin ba, ya dai rage yawan su, rabin abinda yake bashi ne da yana makaranta. Yana so ma yace daga watan nan kar Abbun ya sake turawa saboda shima zai fara samun kudi, ga na bautar kasa da za’a fara bashi, ga kuma Bappa da yayi mishi text ya fada mishi in da zaiyi bautar kasar suna biyan kudi suma.
Bai dai san yanda zai fadama Abbu haka ba, ko yayi mishi text yake tunani, abinda zai fada din ma yana mishi wahala gabaki daya.
“Na wa waya?”
Ya tambaya, yana saka Bilal da yake shiryawa kallon shi.
“Waya irin taka, ko ta Layla haka, waya dai da akeyin chatting, nawa?”
Murmushi Bilal yayi, saboda yanayin yanda Rayyan din yayi tambayar, ya kwana biyu baiyi murmushin daya fito tun daga zuciyar shi ba haka.
“Wacce iri?”
Kai Rayyan ya rausayar.
“Shisa nake tambayar ka, ban sani ba.”
Maballin rigar shi Bilal ya karasa ballewa.
“Akwai har ta dubu tamanin.”
Wani irin kallo Rayyan yayi mishi da ya sa shi kwashewa da dariya, sai yake jin kamar wani abu da yayi duhu a cikin kirjin shi ya dan washe da dariyar da ya yi.
“Baka da hankali ashe Bilal? Dubu tamanin ka sa ka siyi waya? Ai kam saina fadama Ayyar ka.”
Sosai Bilal yake dariya, a tsayin zaman su da Rayyan, yaune karo na farko da ya yi barazanar kai karar shi. Yanda yayi maganar kuma kamar har ran shi zai fadama Ayya cewa ya saka dubu tamanin ya siyi waya.
“Ina ma ka sami kudi?”
Rayyan ya sake tambaya, dariyar da Bilal yake na son saka murmushi kwace mishi, yayi kewar ganin yanayin a tare da Bilal, yayi kewar ganin shi cikin raha, cikin farin ciki, da dariyar nan tashi da take hayaka shi a lokutta da dama, saboda Bilal baisan sanda ya kamata ya daina dariya ba idan ya fara, amman yau idan zai wuni yana dariyar nan hakan zai so. Haka yake fata ya kasance, addu’ar shi kenan, yana kuma sake dora wata cikin rokon Allah ya sa damuwar Bilal din ta yaye kenan. Bai san me zai cigaba da fada ba, amman bayason wannan yanayin ya wuce.
“Da gaske Ayya zan fadama tunda kai baka da hankali.”
Jakar shi Bilal ya dauka yana saka cajar waya a ciki da dan abinda zai bukata, saboda yace zai kwana sai washegari ya dawo tunda har Monday din bashi da jarabawa. Watakila idan ya dan dagama Zaria ya yi numfashi batare da nauyin da yake danne da kirjin shi ba.
“Waye yace maka wayata dubu tamanin take? Tecno ce fa, waccen na bayar saina cika dubu sha biyu na dauki wannan.”
Kai Rayyan ya jinjina.
“Kamar irinta nawa?”
Dan jin Bilal yayi yana hada kudin da wayar ta tasar mishi a cikin kan shi, ko watanni biyu batayi ba.
“Dubu talatin ko da biyar haka, ba zata wuce da takwas ba dai.”
Hannu biyu Rayyan ya saka ya dafe duka kuncin shi, ba dariya yake so ya saka Bilal ba, har ran shi ya girgiza, mamaki yake yana kuma hasaso abinda zai yi da dubu talatin da yafi siyan wata waya muhimmanci, ta hannun shi dubu biyar da dari ko biyu ne ya siyeta sabuwa fil a kwali. Kuma yana ganin abinda wayar su Bilal take yi shima tashi zatayi.
“La hawla wala quwwata ila billah…”
Dariya Bilal yake yi daya kwana biyu baiyi irinta ba, idan kaga fuskar Rayyan din zaka rantse da Allah wani abune mai girma ya faru.
“Allah ya shiryaka Bilal.”
Rayyan ya iya kara furtawa, har lokacin yana jinjina yanda zaka mika wannan kudin ka dauko wata waya. Karasa daukar abinda duk zai bukata Bilal yayi suna fitowa, shiya kulle dakin, Rayyan kuma ya kama hanya yana ficewa daga dakin. Sai da zage zip din jakar shi daya goya ta gaba ya kara saka hannun shi ciki ya laluba yaji magungunan shi suna nan, kafin ya sake kuskuren barin su. Bai san inda zai samu ba a Kaduna, chemist ba zasu siyar mishi babu rubutun likita ba, kuma rabon shi da wani likita kusan shekara daya da wani abu yanzun.
A hanya Bilal ya tsaya ya sai musu ruwa kafin su kama hanyar Kaduna. Hira suke danyi kadan-kadan, Rayyan na sauke wata ajiyar zuciya marar sauti da baisan yana rike da ita ba. Sai yake jin duk surutun Bilal kamar wani sauti daya saba da shi shekara da shekaru sai lokaci daya yaji yayi mishi shiru. Akwai hayaniya a cikin kan shi ko da yaushe. Amman surutun Bilal bai taba zama hayaniya ba, da babu shi a cikin kan nashi sai yake jin shiru a bangaren Bilal din, sai yanzun yaji ya samu wani dai-dai to.
Gyara zaman shi yayi a cikin kujerar yana kwantar da kan shi hadi da lumshe idanuwan shi, bacci ne ya dauke shi, baccin da ya kwana biyu bai samu ba ko da rana, saboda yana kula da yanayin Bilal.
*****
Zuciyar shi a makoshi yake jinta lokacin da yayi parking din motar, kan shi ya dora a jikin abin tukin yana wani irin mayar da numfashi, ji yake kamar zai sume. Ga zufa da take tsatsafo mishi ta ko ina, tunda akayi abin nan rabon shi da ya saka ta a idanuwan shi, ko yanzun ma text yayi mata da ta fito yana bakin hostel din su.
“Inalillahi wa ina ilaihi raji’un.”
Yake iya furtawa, ga shi Aisha ta riga su gama jarabawa, anzo an dauketa tun shekaranjiya, saboda za’ayi bikin yayarta a cikin satin. Daga shi sai ita zasu tafi, bai san mintinan daya dauka a zaune cikin motar ba. Layla ma tun da taga text din shi cewar yana kofar hostel din su wani abu ya kulle a cikinta, a tsorace take, ita tace mishi su manta da komai, amman ta karanta text din yafi sau hamsin kafin ta iya goge shi, ko itama sakon zai isar mata, ko zata iya mantawa da abinda ya faru.
Amman har yanzun tana jinta kamar babu suttura a jikinta, ko da ita kadai ce a kwance. Sam a aji bataso wani ya zauna kusa da ita, kamar abinda ya faru ya saka mata tsoron maza gabaki dayan su, tayi jimla ne saboda yanda har kanta sarawa yayi ranar farko da Rayyan ya daga hannun shi da niyyar ya kai shi jikinta, wani irin matsananci tsoro taji ya shigeta, sai take ganin duk idan tayi kuskuren yin kusanci da wani namiji abinda ya faru tsakaninta da Bilal zai iya sake faruwa, ta kara shiga wani sabon rudanin.
Tana son Rayyan, wata irin soyayya da har tashin ta take da tsakar dare, rokonta karya taba ganewa ko sanin wani abu ya taba faruwa a tsakanin ta da Bilal, group din su ma fita tayi, dan tafi sati tama manta da shi, sai ranar da ta dan samu natsuwa taga sakonnin su, fita tayi tana goge komai, babu wanda ya tambayeta dalili, a aji ma basu ga fuska ba, ta daina musu dariya, ta koma hade fuska kamar yanda takeyi daga farko, da yake babu wanda baisan ta iya masifa ba duk sai suka kiyayeta. Duk da suna mamakin canzawar ta lokaci daya haka.
Sosai ta kan dauki waya ta gwada kiran Bilal, ko gaisawa suyi kamar yanda suka saba, amman sai ta tsinci kanta da kasawa, bata san me zatace mishi ba, saboda kafin ma ta kira din take jin zufa na karyo mata. Tashin hankalin da take ciki daban yake, da kyar ta iya janyo akwatinta ta sauko da shi, amman ta dade bayan ta sauko kafin ta sami kafafuwan ta su motsa ta fita waje, tana ganin motar shi ta hango shi a ciki ya hada kan shi da gaban motar sai da zuciyar ta tayi wata irin dokawa, kamar ta koma ciki da gudu haka take ji.
Bakinta ko yawu babu sanda ta karasa wajen motar, hannuwanta duk sunyi gumi saboda tashin hankali, ta kama baya ta bude saita kasa, hakan yasa ta kama gaban motar tana budewa, cikin yanayin da ya sanar da Bilal ta karaso. A firgice ya dago yana juya kai ya kalleta, sai ya bude nashi bangaren ya fita kamar tana shirin shigowa da bomb, itama yanda kafafuwanta suke rawa yasa ta shiga cikin motar ta zauna tana mayarwa ta rufe.
“Inalillahi wa ina ilaihi raji’un.”
Kawai yake furtawa bayan ya fita daga motar, jikin shi babu inda baya bari saboda tashin hankali. Da kyar ya zagaya ya dauki akwatin Layla ya saka a bayan motar, amman ya kasa shiga, ya rasa ta inda zai zagaya ya shiga cikin motar. Ya kusan mintina goma kafin ya samu ya karasa, ya bude ya zauna. Jikin shi ko ina bari yake sanda ya tayar da motar, babu kowa, babu komai a bayan shi, amman sai yaji kamar yana kara motar da wani abu, da kyar yayi kwana, ya runtsa idanuwan shi ya bude su yafi sau biyar yaki daina ganin kamar akwai yana a cikin su.
Sai da suka fita titi, taga yanda yake gefe da gefe, motar na yawo, in suka kara mintina goma akan titin tabbas zai bugawa wani, ko ya giftawa wani su a buga musu.
“Hamma…”
Layla ta kira tana jin hawaye sun cika mata ido, mutane zasu ce Rayyan na abubuwa a nutse, amman har gobe ba zata ga mutum da yake komai da natsuwa kamar Bilal ba, shisa take gane idan ran shi a bace yake, ko Haris baya abu da natsuwar da Bilal yake yi. Ba sanyin jiki gare shi ba, wata irin nutsuwa yake da ita, kamar komai a lissafe yake yin shi. Shisa yau da karara take ganin natsuwa ta kwace mishi abin yake kara tabata.
“Hamma kayi parking dan girman Allah.”
Ta karasa maganar muryarta na karyewa. Parking din Bilal yayi, zuciyar shi zafi takeyi, baisan da wanne ido zai kalleta ba, baisan me take ji ba idan har shi yana jin kamar duniyar shi tazo karshe. Kan shi ya sake hadewa da jikin steering wheel din, baisan hawayen shi na zuba ba, sai da yaji digar su akan cinyar shi. Kuka yake saboda baisan yanda zaiyi ba, baisan inda zai saka ran shi yaji sanyi ba, yanayin kafadar shi tagani tasan kuka yake marar sauti. Nata hawayen zuba sukeyi itama.
Batajin kowa zai fahimci kunci na zuciya sai ka farka cikin dare, jikinka ko ina yana bari da tashin hankalin da ba zaka iya sanar da mutanen da kasan zasu sama maka sauki ba, mutanen da suka fi kusanci da kai akan kowa, saboda kana tsoron tashin hankalin da kake ciki zai hargitsa tasu duniyar, a lokacin hawayen zasu fara zubar maka, kukan da kake tsoron fitar sautin shi dan kar wani yaji yai maka tambayar da ba zaka taba iya amsa shi ba.
Shine halin da suke ciki ita da Bilal, kuka sukeyi, kukan abinda ya faru da su da basu da kalaman misalta shi, kukan yanda rayuwa ba zata taba zamar musu dai-dai ba, karshe kuka suke na alakar da take tsakanin su da ta samu tangardar da basu da tabbacin zata taba komawa dai-dai, da kyar ta iya dago da kanta tana share hawayenta, bata san me yasa take jin kamar ta fi shi karfin zuciya ba.
“Hamma… “
Ta kira da wani irin yanayi da ya saka Bilal kara shigewa cikin abin tukin kamar yana so ya bace daga motar gabaki daya.
“Ba laifin ka bane, na fada maka ba laifin ka bane ba, ba zan taba ganin laifin ka ba… Karka taba tunanin zan ga laifin ka, kaddararmu ce tazo a haka.”
Kai Bilal yake girgiza mata, ya kasa dagowa, idan tana fada mishi ba laifin shi bane tana kara saka kirjin shi yin nauyi, tana tuna mishi da tarin mutanen da suka bashi amanar ta, tana tuna mishi da cewa abinda take tunani bashi da wani muhimmanci in har su din ba haka suke tunani ba, a duk yanda ya hasko su, baiga zasuyi mishi uzuri ba, saboda ya kasa yima kan shi uzuri.
“Dan Allah ka daina… Ka daina kuka.”
Da kyar ya iya dagowa, ya kasa kallonta, fuskar shi ya goge, ta gefen idanuwan shi yaga ta bude jakarta ta zaro hankici ta dora mishi akan cinyar shi, dauka yayi yana goge fuskar shi sosai, yayi gyaran muryar da yake jin ko da yayi magana ba zata fito ba. Layla ba zata taba gane tashin hankalin shi ba, su Ayya ka dai yake da a fadin duniyar shi, tana da wasu yan uwan bayan Mami, akwai wanda suke uba daya, bashi da kowa daya rage mishi a duniyar shi banda Ayya. Ba hulda take yi da daginta ba sosai, balle ya san sauran dangin shi na bangarenta.
Su da Abbu ne kadai makusantan da yake da su sai Rayyan da ita, sune kuma mutanen da ya kasa rikewa amana. Aisha ma da yake jin tashi ce, yake jin ba zata bar shi ba, bayajin zata zauna da shi bayan tasan abinda ya faru, sai da ya kunna motar tukunna yace,
“Kaddara, ita ce kalmar da kika zaba Layla?”
Ya karasa tambayar yana juyawa ya kalleta, sai take ganin idanuwan shi sun mata wayam, kamar babu emotions ko daya a cikin su, wani irin murmushi yayi mai ciwo daya karya wani abu a cikin zuciyarta.
“Kaddarar nan zata iya rabani da mutanen da su kadai nake dasu a fadin duniyata… Idan kin mun uzuri baya nufin su din zasuyi mun.”
Shiru tayi, tana jujjuya maganar shi badan bata da amsar bashi ba, in ta bude bakinta sautin kuka ne zai fito, har saida ya hau titi, wannan karin a nutse yake tukin, sai da ta tabbatar zata iya magana batare da ta fashe da kuka ba sannan tace
“Shisa ba zamu taba fada musu ba.”
Titi Bilal yake kallo, yaji me tace, ya zabi yin shiru ne kawai, saboda zuciyar shi na cikin wani hali.
Taya zai kalli idanuwan Abbu bakin shi ya yi shiru?
Ta ina zai hada idanuwa da Abbu kamar bai ci amanar daya bashi ba?
Ana mutuwa sau daya, shine yardar kowa, amman a tsayin satikan nan, ya mutu a duk ranar da zai tashi daki daya da Rayyan, ya ga Rayyan yayi mishi murmushi, numfashin shi daukewa yake yi.
Ba zai iya kallon Mami kamar bai taba amanar da ta dauko ba.
Wannan karin bayajin mutuwar da zata dauke shi ta wasa ce.
Bashi da tabbacin idan numfashin shi ya tsaya zai dawo.
