Gidan yayi mata fili, filin da ba’a iya waje take jin shi ba harma da zuciyarta. Idan ta rufe idanuwanta ta tuno lokuttan da take dariya kamar a duniya bata da wata matsala, sai taga kamar a wata rayuwar ce daban, wadda ta sha bamban da wadda take ciki yanzun. Tazarar da take tsakanin wancen lokacin da kuma yanzun tayi nisan da take ganin kamar dorata akan wasu yan shekaru yayi kadan. Saboda babu yanda za’ace farin ciki ya bace daga rayuwar dan adam lokaci daya haka. A yanayin da zuciyarta take ciki ko wani taji yayi dariya mai sauti saita kalle shi, sai taji kamar ta girgiza shi tace masa ya kara yin wata, yayi iya wadda zai iya saboda lokaci na iya zuwa da sai dai ya hasaso dariyar a tunanin shi.

Yara uku, uku kacal da suka zame mata jarabawa, masu guda biyar fa? Takwas, goma, maza masu ashirin harda doriya fa? Addu’ar da take yiwa iyayenta da kasa ta rufe ma idanuwa saita ninku, wanne fama sukayi da ita kafin su aurar da ita, haka samun yara yake da wahala daman? Lokacin da ta kafe kan auren Baabuga, abubuwan da Baba ya dinga hango mata ashe shi kadai yasan me yake ji a zuciyar shi. Kokarin da iyaye sukeyi akan ‘ya’yan su nagartattu da wanda suka baude hanya duka ba zai taba misaltuwa ba. Su kuma yaran ba zasu taba gane girman wannan kokarin ba sai ranar da suka haifi nasu, idan sun haifa din ma an jaraba su ta hanyar wannan yaran.

Duka yaushe ne take rike da hannuwan Yelwa, yaushe ne Yelwar bata iya aiwatar da komai batare da taimakonta ba, yaushe ne Yelwar ta kalli cikin idanuwanta kamar ta dauki zantukanta, sai ace ta nemeta ta rasa, ba kuma ta da wata dabara ko abu da zata aiwatar akan hakan. Ta yaya zuciyarta zata warke daga wannan ciwon? Ta ina zata fara? Rabonta da baccin kirki harta manta, cike suke da mafarkai mabanbanta akan Yelwa da halin da take ciki. Idan ta farka ma itace a ranta, tilon ‘yarta da batasan inda take ba.

Kamar bata da wannan ciwon a zuciyarta, kamar Julde bai sani ba ya zabi ya kara mata wani tunanin akan wanda yake cunkushe da ruhinta.

“Tsakanin Kano da Marake wasu awanni ne da ba zasu hanani zuwa ganinki ba Daada…”

Ya fadi yana rike da hannayenta.

“Idan nace karka tafi zaka fasa? Kai kadai ka ragemun da nake gani, kai kadai nake gani Julde.”

Shine abinda taso tace masa, shine abinda ta fada a cikin kanta, amman harshenta yayi mata nauyi.

“Inajin Marake ne mafarin komai, Daada inajin idan har ina cikin kauyen nan zuciyata ba zata samu sararin sauyin da nake bukata ba… Ina so in shaki iska a wani waje da baya zagaye da tunin akan abubuwan dana rasa… Bana so in cigaba da kallon kofa ina jiran mutanen da banda tabbaci akan dawowar su.”

Ya zata hanashi tafiya bayan ya fadi haka? Bayan har a cikin idanuwanshi da suke cike taf da hawaye tana iya hango zuciyarshi da take a karye, a karye da abubuwan da suka fi karfin shekarun shi. Kwananshi uku a cikin dakinta, alwala ma sai dai ta kawo masa ruwa da roba yayi a cikinta, inda ya idar da sallah nan yake komawa ya kwanta, banda ruwa, abinci sai tayi da gaske zata samu ya tashi yaci cokali biyu ko uku ya sake komawa ya kwanta. Idan ta leka fuskar shi, idanuwan shi a rufe suke, badon hawayen dake bin gefen fuskarshi ba, zata dauka bacci yakeyi.

“Nagaji, nagaji sosai Daada, kibarni in kwanta.”

Bata hanashi ba, amman a cikin kwanaki ukun nan ko wanka baiyi ba. Ranar na hudun ma Saratu ce ta shigo, itama duk tayi zuru-zuru kamar wadda taga wani abu daya firgitata. Dakin Daada ta nuna mata, ita ta shiga, takai awa biyu a ciki, sannan ta fito, kamar ta kara ramewa fiye da lokacin da ta shiga dakin. Abinda Daada bata sani ba shine da Saratu ta shiga, ta dafa Julde da yake kwance yafi sau goma yana ture hannunta.

“Ka tashi, ba su kadai kake dasu ba Julde… Bashi kadai bane yaronka, akwai Salim, akwai Fadila… Ka tashi don Allah, basu kadai kake dasu ba, basu kadai suke bukatarka ba…”

Ta karasa muryarta na karyewa, tana riko hannun shi da yake son kwacewa, dakyar ta iya kamo hannun shi, ta dora a cikinta da kamar hakan yake jira abinda yake ciki ya motsa har yaji motsin ta cikin tafin hannun shi

“Ya kake so muyi? Idan muka rasaka ya kake so muyi?”

Mirginowa yayi ya juyo, saita dago shi, baiyi kokarin kwacewa ba harta dora kanshi a cinyarta

“Zuciyata na mun ciwo… Saratu zuciyata namun ciwo”

Ya karasa dumin hawayen shi na gangarawa har kan cinyarta

“Ina nan, kayi kuka idan zakaji sanyi, kayi duk abinda zai kawo maka sauki, amman karka barmu”

Kukan yayi, a jikinta. Kuka yayi kamar karamin yaro, kuka yayi kamar ba namiji ba, namiji mai mata da yara. Kuka yayi da tunda yake duniya bai taba yin irin shi ba, har a kasusuwan jikinshi kuma yake da yakinin daga ranar zai wahala ya sake kuka mai yawan wannan. Har saida bacci ya dauke shi sannan Saratu ta zame jikinta daga nashi tana fitowa. Da Magriba shima sai gashi ya fito, ya kalli Daada yana mata murmushi, kafin ya fita daga gidan gabaki daya. A ranar ya fara shirin barin Marake, ta dauka Datti zai hanashi, sai dai harya zo ya tsugunna a gabanshi yayi masa sallama bai daga ido ya kalle shi ba, baice komai ba.

Kuma har yau da shekara uku kenan, ko Julde yazo duk juma’a bayan mako biyu ko uku, daga shi har abinda ya kawo Datti baya kallansu. Balle kuma ya amsa gaisuwar da Julden zaiyi masa, da Dije tayi masa magana cikin wata irin gajiyawa ya ce,

“Ban isa ba, akan Julde. Ya nuna mun hakan fiye da sau daya. Alkawarine nayiwa kaina, bakina ba zai kuma ba, in dai akan shine, yaje shi da rayuwar daya zaba”

Ranar ne kuma ta juye masa abinda yake cikinta, abinda ta dade tana rikewa

“Kaso mafi girma na abinda ya same su kaine, zan dauki sauran daya rage saboda na zabi zuba muku ido maimakon yin iya bakin kokarina wajen nuna muku kuskuren da kukeyi. Ka so su, nice shaida, sai dai soyayyarka ce ta fara ja musu matsalar da suke ciki Datti, soyayyarka da ta hana ka nuna musu wata rana zasu nemi abinda zaka iya hana su, zaka nemi abinda zaka so suyi maka biyayya, duk basu son wannan ba…”

Ta sa hannu ta share hawayen daya zubo mata kafin ta cigaba,

“Saika nuna musu indai kana raye babu wani abu da zasu nema su kasa samu, sai kayi tunanin tarbiyarsu a hannunka take, shi yasa ka ganin aibun yaran mutane, saboda kaine, Datti, kafi karfin abinda kake ganin yaran wasu nayi ya sami naka. Ranar da suka fara nuna maka bakafi karfin su ture maganarka ba, saika kara kuskure akan wanda kayi, daka gwada lallashi, ka gwada fada, saika ga lokaci ya kure maka, sunyi bushewar da lankwasa su yake dai-dai da karyewar su, saika daure su da bakinka, kayi musu dauri na gaske da bakinka, su sukayi motsin Datti, matsatsin daurin da kayi musu da suka motsa sai suka karye da kansu… Gashi nan mu duka muke tayasu jinyar.”

Idanuwa Datti ya rufe, kalamanta na shigar shi, yanajin kamar jininshi na kara gudu a cikin jikinshi, kuskuren shi da yaketa dannewa ne take fito masa dashi tana goga masa a ko ina na jikinshi, tana tursasa shi ya fuskanci abinda a wannan bigiren bashida karfin fuskantar shi.

“Kuskuren namu ne, kuskuren mune duka…”

Baice komai ba, harta shiga daki baice mata komai ba, kuka tayi marar sauti a cikin daki, yai nashi a tsakar gida. Kowa da kalar ciwon da yake ji. Datti najin yanda kamar bai taba wata rayuwa babu yaranshi a cikinta ba, yanajin yanda sauran shekarun duka yayi sune cikin zaman jiran ranar da zai zama uba, da tazo sai yake jin yana da kudi, yana da asali, yana da duk wani abu da zai isheshi ya karesu daga dukkan abin ki, yana kuma da girman zuciyar daya kaunace su da dukkaninta, yanzun da komai ya hargitse masa sai yake kara jin yanda duk wani numfashi da zai ja ya fitar kamar gayyata ce yake yiwa ajalin shi.

Dije najin karshen duniyarta ne yazo. Sai Bukar shima ya fado mata. Borno yace mata, ammam Borno a ina? Gabas? Yamma? Kudu? Arewa? Ko a tsakanin duka hudun? Shima idan neman shi ta fita yi bata san ta inda zata fara ba, yana lafiya? Me yasa ya dade fiye da kowanne lokaci? Yaushe zai dawo? Kullum tunaninta akan shi baya wuce wannan zagayen, wanne hali yake ciki, yaushe zata sake saka idanuwanta akan shi. Sai taga kamar tunanin nata ne ya fisgo mata shi ranar yammacin wata Alhamis da zata cigaba da tunowa, saboda itace Alhamis ta karshe da ta saka shi a idanuwanta.

Sai dai ba wannan Alhamis din bace kadai zata kafa tarihi a rayuwar Dije

“Daada Am.”

Ya kirata a maimakon sallama, cikin muryar nan tashi mai sanyin gaske. Cikin wani yanayi daya sata bude idanuwanta ta kuma dago daga kishingidar da tayi a tsakar gidan tana kallon shi, murmushi yayi mata. Murmushin shi da yake cike da sanyin halin shi da kuma wani abu da na shine kawai, na Bukar da bakowa Allah yake halitta da shi ba.

“Daada…”

Ya sake kira, numfashi taja, ta fitar, ta sake ja tana fitarwa.

“Bukar.”

Ta amsa tana sake kallon fiye da fuskarshi wannan karin, yadine a jikinshi kalar bula, amman yayi wata irin dauda kamar wanda yayi birgima a kasa, saita kalli kafafuwanshi, takalmane yake sanye dasu yan soso, sababbi kamar ranar ya fara takasu, amman kafarshi kurace tamkar yayi kwanaki baiga ruwa ba, bana wanka ba kawai harda na alwala. Tun da take dashi, ko a lokacin yarinta bai taba dauda irin wannan ba. Bata taba ganin shi haka ba, jakace a hannun shi daya, saiya sata duban dayan hannun nashi, zuciyarta nayo tsalle ta daki allon kirjinta tana komawa mazauninta da wani irin yanayi.

Yarone, hannuwan shi duka biyun rike dana Bukar, sai dai ya labe a bayan kafafuwan shi, sai daya jawo shine ya fito fili, amman akwai tsoro a cikin idanuwanshi, sai taga kamar Bukar, saiya tuna mata lokacin da Bukar yake da shekarun shi, zuciyarta na wata irin cika, taji hawaye masu zafi na tarar mata a idanuwa, jan hannun yaron Bukar yayi har suka karasa inda Daada take zaune, jakar ya ajiye a gefe, yana zama akan tabarmarta ya kama yaron ya zaunar a tsakaninsu. Sai yanzun da suka zo dab da ita ta kula bashi kadai yayi daudar ba harda yaron, kayane na yan binni a jikinshi, da alama zasuyi tsada ko ba’a fada mata ba, don tana ganin irin kayan a jikin su Salim idan Julde ya bayar an siyo musu daga binni.

“Aure nayi Daada… Ga Nawfal.”

Ya fadi yana mika mata hannun yaron da ta rike, hawayenta na zubowa. Tanajin shekarun da ta rasa na rayuwar Bukar suna ninka mata, yayi aure, bata sani ba, yana da mata, ko sunanta bata sani ba, ga Nawfal, da ko baikai shekaru uku ba ya kusa. Bukar ta kalla, haka tata jarabawar tazo, rasa abubuwa a tare da yaran da suka fito daga jikinta.

“Abubuwa da yawa sun faru Daada, abubuwan da zanso ace ina da cikakken lokacin da zan miki bayani yanzun, amman babu, sai dai idan na dawo…”

Bata san me yasa a duk abinda ya fada ta zabi tambayar shi.

“Ina zaka tafi?”

A maimakon tarin tambayoyin da suketa kaikawo a cikin kanta ba, amman ita tafi sauran. Yanzun yazo, yanzun taganshi bayan wasu shekaru, me yasa yake mata maganar sake tafiya ko numfasawa baiyi ba balle ya huta.

“Na barta, zan koma mu taho tare ne…banda lokacin da zan kara batawa Daada, rayuwarta na cikin hatsari.”

Cike da rudani da rashin gane inda zantukanshi suka dosa take kallon shi, sai dai kalaman shi na gaba ma rudata suka sakeyi suna jefa wani firgici a zuciyarta.

“Wani abu a zuciyata yana fada mun shi kadai ne kwan da nake da rabo a duniya Daada, ga amanar dana, gatan da na hasaso ma rayuwar shi mai yawa ne, ga amanar shi nan kafin in samu dawowa, dalilin da zaisa ni barin shi mai karfine…”

Kafin kuma tace wani abu ya janyo jakar dake gefen shi ya mika mata.

“Ga wannan Daada, duka abinda yake ciki mallakin shine, amanar ba taki bace wannan, ta Hamma ce, zai damkata a hannun shi a lokacin daya dace… Banda lokaci… Banda lokaci da zan tsaya in bashi da kaina.”

Sai fadi yake bashida lokaci kamar yana ganin agogon da yake dauke da kwanakin rayuwar shi.

“Bukar kayi mun magana yanda zan fahimta… Babu wani abu da nagane a cikin zantukan ka…rayuwar wacece a hatsari? Meye a jakar nan? Me kake nufi da ga amanar danka nan? Kai kuma fa? Ina zaka je?”

Tambayoyine masu yawan gaske da suke turereniya da junansu wajen fito mata, sai dai mikewar da Bukar yayi ta katse mata su.

“Bani da lokaci Daada… Idan na dawo zan fada miki.”

Ya amsa yana mikewa.

“Ka zauna a wajen Daada in dawo Nawfal.”

Hannun shi daya Nawfal ya mika, Bukar din ya sumbaci nashi hannun kafin ya dora akan na Nawfal yana kuma janyewa. Hannun Nawfal ya daga ya manna a kuncin shi na dama, na haggu, da kuma kan goshin shi. Kamar wani abune da suka sabayi, kallon su Dije takeyi, ta kasa ko da kwakkwaran motsi, komai yayi mata tsaye, musamman da Bukar ya juya, harshenta ya nade a bakinta, ta kasa ko da kiranshi balle kuma tayi yunkurin hanashi tafiya, ya juyo ya kalleta, kamar shine kallon karshe, ya kalleta da fatan rayuwa ta sake ara musu lokacin makamancin yau din, kafin ya fice daga gidan, ya bace ma ganinta.

“Kamar Bukar nagani ya fita.”

Datti daya shigo ya fadi yana dawo da ita cikin hayyacinta.

“Ya sake tafiya… Bukar ya sake tafiya.”

Sosai Datti ya sake shiga cikin gidan yana kallon su, ita da Nawfal. Badon Nawfal din da kuma jakar da take gani ba, da zuwan Bukar zai mata kamar mafarki, kamar daya daga cikin mafarkan da ta saba nashi. Amman ga shaida nan, yazo, ya sake tafiya tana kallon shi bata tsayar dashi ba. Hannun shi Nawfal ya mikawa Datti, ya kalli hannun, ya kalli fuskar Nawfal da ko ba’a fada ba yasan jinin Bukar ne, ga mamakin shi saiya kama hannun yana mikar dashi, saiya daga shi ya rike shi a jikinshi.

“Ya sunan ka?”

Ya tambaya da fulatanci.

“Nawfal… Kai ya sunanka?”

Ya amsa, murmushi Datti yayi, murmushin da Dije ta dade bata gani ba a fuskar shi, ya sake gyarama Nawfal zama a jikin shi suna magana cikin yaren da yafi komai soyuwa a wajen Datti.

Kamar Bukar bai zo ya sake tafiya kamar walkiya ba
Kamar duniyar bata sake birkice mata ba.

Sai ta kalli Nawfal da yayi dariya, yanayin fuskar shi da sautin dariyar na mata iri daya data Bukar.

Nawfal
Dan Bukar
Amanar ta.

*****

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